7 ways to motivate kids when they are completely unmotivated

All parents dream of raising motivated children and giving them access to better life opportunities. But what if your child doesn’t want to grow up and learn, or refuses to work for success? How can you motivate your children to be completely indifferent to what’s happening around them?

Depending on your parenting style, you may already be using several methods, such as intimidation, bribery, and punishment. It turns out that some may work in certain situations, but not in others.

So how can you get interested in doing important activities without pushing your child away? There are quite a few strategies, including fostering internal motivation and changing priorities and perspectives.

This article describes the main factors that hinder your child’s motivation and some of the mistakes you should avoid when regaining your child’s motivation. You will also learn seven practical approaches to motivate children to be good in life. Because every child is unique, some are better suited to your situation than others.

Now let’s get down to the juicy part.

Why do children lose their motivation?

Most kids want themselves all the time and are very frustrated when asked to do even the most minor chores and even school assignments. Are you familiar?

The bright side is that you’re not the only one struggling to find a magical way to motivate your child. But the bright side is that you don’t always control your child’s behavior and you can’t put your motivation in their minds.

Loss of motivation is common in children. Children’s interests change dynamically as they mature. What motivates a child at one age can suddenly become irrelevant at another life stage.

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It has more to do with the essential motivation that occurs when a child is engaged in doing something fun, rather than bringing in any material awards. However, some external artificial factors can also affect a child’s motivation.

Taking the level of school motivation, there are six inhibitors studied by Dr. Beth Hennessy.

  • competition
  • time limit
  • Expected reward
  • Surveillance
  • External control
  • Expected evaluation

How a child behaves in different conditions also depends on his or her personality. Therefore, there is no universal way to motivate all children.

7 Ways to Motivate Unmotivated Children

Some spectators may label an unmotivated child as lazy. But what is laziness, if not a complete loss of motivation?

If they aren’t lying in bed day or night (in which case they may suffer from depression), their drive is still there, but it’s in a different place than what you want. I have.

Unfortunately, there is no 100% effective way to motivate your child at all times. Still, some motivational ideas for kids work better than others and are definitely worth trying.

1. Modify parental expectations

If the child is unmotivated, it may be due to severe self-criticism caused by non-compliance with the high standards of the parent. As a result, children will not be able to start their activities due to fear of external criticism and devaluation.

So here is the solution. You can realistically evaluate your child’s abilities and talents and stop pushing them too hard. What motivates children at school is to focus on activities that bring joy and satisfaction to them.

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For example, if your child prefers history lessons to math, promote this love and express your interest in this subject. Approve their hobbies and show them that you are ready to help or be part of it as needed.

2. Plant ideas for your child’s life plan

Most children live in a bubble where parents provide them with shelter, food, and some luxury, depending on their financial position. They haven’t tasted adult life yet and don’t know how it works. Because of this, many teenagers grow with a low level of responsibility.

That said, you have two options to rock your child. First, if a teenager refuses to study because he finds it useless, show the reality of most people dropping out of school. Be careful not to offend anyone and suggest that working on long shifts in low-paying jobs is not a sacred dream for your child.

The second step is to help the child explore some exciting careers that he may want to pursue. Talk about their strengths and ask about their passion. Then make a list of some areas of interest and specify the skills you need.

Some examples of things that may motivate your child are working in the medical field, making music, or starting a business. At this point it is imperative to refrain from criticism. As your child finds exciting future potential, their motivation increases dramatically.

3. Invent rewards for doing “boring things”

Isn’t it interesting to hear many parents complaining about children who don’t like housework? How many adults and children have enjoyed it so much?

Not surprisingly, many of us strive to create a comfortable living environment, which forces us to wash, rub and cook. It’s our choice as a responsible adult, but it doesn’t work that way for children.

Sometimes the only motivation for children’s involvement in household chores is a particular reward. It is called external motivation and enhances the task with external rewards such as praise and money.

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However, plan what rewards your child will have for carefully performing their assigned chores. Make sure it is suitable for your age. And don’t forget to mention how well they did their job, even if it wasn’t perfectly perfect.

4. Change attitude

The younger your child, the less motivation you will make to correct their behavior. Imagine, for example, wanting a 3-year-old child to learn that it’s good to help around the house and to develop this habit in the future. How can I motivate my baby to do something?

Children of this age mainly look at and imitate adults. Therefore, you can provide your child with a positive example and show them that achieving small goals is fun.

An important factor here is to provide an opportunity for success. This makes the task small and easy to perform so that the child wants to repeat success later.

5. Provide your help

Previous success can easily motivate your child to succeed in the future. Unfortunately, many children are afraid of failure and want to avoid performing some tasks to ensure their safety.

What can you do? Divide the task into smaller achievable parts, set short-term goals, and help your child achieve them.

Be careful not to work for them. For school assignments, look up books and other sources together. Guide them to find a solution on their own, staying on their side.

At the same time, don’t put in a time frame or say “wasting time” or “how many times do you have to show this?” Don’t let them feel your disappointment, even if they can’t achieve good results. Instead, your goal is to inspire them to learn things and enjoy the process.

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6. Admire the process as much as the result

The motives of preschoolers and elementary school children depend on external reactions from adults. The way parents motivate their children at this age is very different from the way they approach middle and high school students. Basically, there are three serious mistakes to avoid.

  • Demonstration of the correct solution before the child finds it independently.
  • Lack of praise for trials with no significant results;
  • Refuse to help the child learn new activities.

Children need constant encouragement and do not respond well to criticism. Therefore, not only praise the satisfactory results (for example, when the child completes the puzzle), but also realize how much effort they are spending on the task and say they like their diligence.

7. Don’t blame your child for personality

Sometimes, no matter how many hours you wake up to motivate your child, your efforts may not affect them-and it’s not anyone’s fault. It’s all about the character of the child and rarely adheres to our vision of wanting to be them.

You can have a hard time motivating your son to clean the room and wash his clothes. You can plead, argue, and cajore, and maybe he will obey from time to time. But if he doesn’t share your attitude towards cleanliness, the amount of rewards, punishments, or praises won’t change that.

Final idea

Motivation is an important factor in starting and completing activities. Therefore, that loss is detrimental to a person’s chances of achieving positive results. However, it is also dynamic and can be nurtured by applying the above techniques.

So stay calm, be patient and try different approaches. And most importantly, surround your child with love and compassion, regardless of school performance or behavior.

Featured Photo Credits: Keren Fedida via 7 ways to motivate kids when they are completely unmotivated

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